Our Baby Is Still ALIVE!!

Believe it or not, our baby is still alive!  She's been great the past couple days as Mommy goes to work.  And today, with NPR in the background, coffee brewing, and Z in her bassinet next to me, I feel like we have a good chance of making it through the day ... again!

Yesterday was an interesting day.  We feared that ZB might have gotten sick while we were in Oklahoma for the holidays.  So, after a bunch of coughs, a couple sneezes and a few runny noses we decided to take her to the pediatrician.  Turns out she does have a little cold, but nothing that time won't cure.  Whew!  Crazy though, that it was our first unscheduled trip to the Docs.

I was also able to get a few work things taken care of for Red Letterbox Productions yesterday.  My colleague and good friend Brandon Slavinski came over and we worked on our internal agreement, marketing strategies and other miscellaneous tasks that needed to be done.  RLP is a very exciting company that if you haven't heard of you should totally check out.  We work with actors, musicians and aspiring performers to create high quality music, photography, graphic design and websites. 

mmmm....this coffee is GOOD!  I kind of like waking up at 7:30 every morning.  Kind of.  I get so much done.

And last but not least my good friend Jacob Barnse, from our Oklahoma Christian days, flew out to California yesterday and is chilling for a couple days.  Somethin' about a Rose Bowl football game, I dunno.  But it's cool!  I haven't seen this guy since the wedding and it's fun to see him interact w/ Zo.  Oh how my life has changed since me and this guy used to hang out in college... :)

While I'm taking the day easy, I'm still gonna try to get some stuff done.  Then lunch w/ the mama and perhaps the beach later! 

Much love!
-marc

Now Playing: Mr. Mom.

Today starts my adventure as Mr. Mom.  I dropped my wife off at work at 7:45 this morning and came home with my 15 week old baby girl.  We turned on NPR, made some coffee and now as she naps I'm sitting down to post my first blog for 2010.

I thought about making a new blog to chronicle my new life as a stay at home dad ("SAHD"), but wanted to keep my current readers and figured making a new blog was just another thing to worry about.  I will be blogging from here for a lonnnng time.

What's on the agenda for the day?  I'm going to read a web building design book my brother Blake got me for Christmas, work on our 2010 Budget and Business Plan, take the X-Mas tree down and of course play with Zoe.  We'll see how much of that gets done, playing with Zoe might take most of the day.  :) It will be interesting to see how working from home works with an infant.  I'm going to take it slowly, and not try to get too much done this week but ease into being a SAHD, business man, photographer, web designer and blogger. 

If you have a second, stop by my beautiful and hard working wife's blog, facebook, and twitter to tell her how awesome she is for being strong and supportive.  We both never thought we'd be part of the growing statistic of families where the wife works, but we're taking it one day at a time with positive strides.  She's amazing, and I already miss her - but this will be good for us and the family.  We will be stronger and better in the long run. 

Alright - I guess that's it for today.  I want to promise more blogs, I always do - but I can't predict the future.  You'll just have to stay tuned and see what happens next! 

Much love,
-Marc, the new Mr. Mom!

Sittin' in Oklahoma with my baby girl...

It was around Christmas time last year that we made Zoe. Now, I'm sitting in my relatives' home in Oklahoma with my very own baby girl next to my side. I'm married and a dad. A lot changes in a year. Stacey just went out with one of her old best girlfriends and Zoe and I? We're just chilling next to each other. What better time to blog? Oh wait ... I think Zoe might need a diaper change.

Actually I wanted to change the design of the blog, then I figured I should post too. Why not, right? It's always around this time of the year when I think "Hmmm...I should blog more."

Hold on ... diaper change time.

OK ... man I thought of a lot to write about in that couple of minutes. Like, how lucky I am to have a loving wife who loves me and our little girl more than the world. I couldn't have asked for a better woman to be in my life for the rest of my life. She's perfect. Well, except for her tardiness, but I can overlook that. :) I see couples having problems and divorce rates going through the rough, an unhappiness running rampage between parents - but not with us. We're a team, and a damn good one at that.

Hold on ... time to feed the baby!

OK ... now my brain is getting too full for this post. I should blog professionally. I did back in college. Back in Oklahoma, only a few blocks from here I got $5.15 for every blog post I wrote. I could be a part of the mom and dad blogging community. Diaper companies and toy makers, feel free to send me samples of ANYTHING and I'll write about it. Send me samples and $$ and I'll write positively about it. :)

Next year will be crazy. After our trip to Oklahoma Stacey goes back to work at Advertise.com. I will be a full-time dad. That is my job. Photography is taking a backseat, as hard as that is to type, it's important for me to focus on the most important thing right now, and that's little Zoe. I never thought I would be part of the statistic of growing stay at home dads, but here I am, and happy to do so. Life will be a trip, like it always has been, but it will be fun. I'll still shoot on the weekends or after 5, and with RLP growing and becoming more successful I'll be able to create websites from home while watching Zoe! But I might stay in my sweats for weeks at a time... ;)

Having a child has been crazy. I know people do it all the time, but I've never done it before. My favorite part? When she smiles at me ... like she is now. It makes all the financial hardship, late nights, and difficult situations worth it. I've lost friends over Zoe, missed out on "opportunities" for work, and haven't gone to see a movie in 13 weeks - but I wouldn't change a single moment.

So here's to 2010. I want to show my baby girl that even though the world is way messed up, life is alright if you surround yourself with people who love you and who you love. Love is all you need!

Much love,
-marc

Zoe is 8 weeks old...What can you do?

It's Saturday night. A year ago on a Saturday night you could find me at a concert, bar, club, friends house, partying and having a crazy good time. Tonight my wife and I are chilling at home, listening to music, having just as good of a time, but with our little 8 week old girl.

Her name's Zoe, I'm sure you know that by now if you're reading my blog, and she's the most amazing thing to happen to me since...oh, I dunno, Stacey? :) They both lighten up my world daily, hourly, even every moment. Stacey's so happy to be a mom, and Zoe is so happy to be alive. She tells me with her smiles, they both do.

I didn't know what it was going to be like to be a dad. I had no clue. I didn't really comprehend that I was GOING to be a dad until the moment she exited Stacey's body and entered the world. Her first cry was my first "oh. uh. i'm - a - dad." And so far it's been a great, exciting, entertaining trip.

We've taken her all over California, although she's never seen the beach...but that will change once it gets a little warmer. Time suddenly goes FASTER. It's harder to get out of the house when we do get out. Not only do I have to get ready, and Stacey, but we have to make sure a baby's ready too. And that means bottles, diapers, burp cloths, blankets, change in outfits (this is hollywood), and much much more. I'm surprised we even eat!

Did I mention that Stacey is an AWESOME mom? She's the best mom I know. Sad to say, but happy to say at the same time.

I wish my mom could've met Zoe. She would love her.

Sometimes we talk about how Zoe is a part of my mom. That my mom probably looked like Zoe when SHE was 8 weeks old. How crazy is that? It's the circle of life I assume, one goes out and another comes in.

Words can't explain, no matter how hard or poetic I get, the feelings of being a dad. When Zoe smiles at me, I feel a joy that is new and exciting. When Stacey (as she always does) does something very motherly, it creates a feeling in my heart that I can't explain really. I'm a family. I have a family. I am in charge of another little human being, who is my daughter, and will ALWAYS be my daughter. That's cool. That's magical. That's the best feeling in the world. My head rests a little higher on my shoulders.

And as messed up as the world is, as sirens blare outside our window right now as I type, I know that Zoe Marcia Blackwell will be fine because she has good parents, a good family, and a good network of friends. She will know love, and peace, and happiness, and she will have everything she needs, always. She will grow up with 2 parents who love her unconditionally and be supported up until our last days.

I ask that YOU create a better world for my daughter as well. Don't do anything that would comprise Zoe. Don't be a jerk in traffic, try to be more environmentally conscience, treat your neighbors better than you have. If everyone does this, maybe ... JUST MAYBE, we can change the world and Zoe won't have to know war, or hate, or discrimination.

That's all.

Zoe Marica Blackwell

My mom died 4 years ago today.

When people write they say you should always have a beginning, a middle, and an end. Usually when I write I don't have an end in mind ... much like today. Today marks the 4 year "anniversary" of my mother's death. She died August 25th, 2005 of ovarian cancer and none of us saw it coming.

It's not any easier today than it was 4 years ago.

I thought I could sit down and write a blog post without crying ... but I didn't even make it to the third paragraph. I want to write something...something beautiful about my mom. I want to remember her in a way that would make her proud. I want people to appreciate their moms and love being alive, because some people aren't so lucky.

My mom was a perfect lady. Granted, probably not, but through my eyes, she was. She was a good Christian woman who loved her family more than herself. She walked every day ... she even completed a marathon! She was healthy, happy, and full of life. She worked hard, played hard and lived hard. Everyone loved her, from the ladies at church to the neighbors down the street. She was amazing and taught our entire family how to love one another. There was no reason she should have been taken from this world so early. NO reason. But she was.

I wish she was here to see the birth of our child. I wish she could've met Stacey and Blake's new wife, Kacee. She wanted more than anything for us to find good woman to marry and she'd be tickled pink that all of her sons are now married. And the fact that she'd be a grandma soon would've thrilled her to no end. She would've loved being a Grandma.

But like we all have learned in my family the past 4 years, there are a lot of things that just won't ever happen. She wasn't at our weddings, she won't see the birth of our kids, she won't be at Christmas anymore, and we'll never get to eat her meatloaf ever again.

As one life exits the world, another comes into it. And I'm learning that more and more every day. While the world isn't fair - it is at the same time. People have to go to make room for more people. But who the world chooses to take is completely and totally random.

I keep writing, like if it's going to make sense if I do ... but it won't drag it out anymore than it has to. It never will make sense and my mom will never come back.

Reminder

I'm 100 yards from the beach. Taking calls, scheduling photoshoots, working on websites ... chillin'. This is a reminder that I love my job and my life. :)

Peace,
-marc